The Day Her Yoga Pants Ran Off

She found a yoga class on line and went to get her pants out of the closet. They weren't there. She checked the jammie/stretchy fat pant secton. And the black pant area. They were not with the chefy pants or the substitute teacher pants.The group home pants stayed in a group of their own so she did not waist her time there. They knew better than mingle with the prison pants. Puzzled she went as far as to bend over in her big now torn apart closet to check the special lacy drawer to see if they had got board waiting for her and had gone to seek out their own excitement. No luck. They were long gone.
She sighed and plopped down in the tangle of cloth on her closet floor. How long had they been gone and she never even noticed their disappearance? Did they leave of their own accord or where they taken? Maybe they snuck out in a gym bag. Those soft pants may have went wrapped around a wayward kitten or used to soak up spilled kool aid before being tossed. She just hoped they had not hidden behind her dryer so long they instantly combusted to end the wait. Really pants, are twenty years too long to wait?